Violence Never Solves Anything
by Rhiannon A. Christy
Summary: or Sherlock Learns A Valuable Lesson


Sherlock had never been in a relationship, well not really. Janine had been a case, though he had taken it as a learning experience. Not that he had actually been with her long enough to learn the finer points of being a boyfriend. And he most assuredly hadn't ever encountered the situation he now found himself in with her, for which he was both grateful and regretful.

When he had entered into a relationship with Molly he hadn't really thought it through. In his opinion nothing would change all that much, well besides the physical side of things. How wrong he had been, now as he stood in the doorway to his room he wished he had taken more notes during the Janine experience. At least he would have been better prepared for traversing the dangerous mires of having a girlfriend.

"You should have left for work two hours ago." Sherlock shook his head at the figure of Molly all curled up on his bed. She was rocking back and forth emitting a low groan of pain every few seconds.

"I've called in, now go away." Molly curled in on herself, wishing for nothing more than to pass out for the next twenty-four hours. She had known that she should have remained at hers the night before, but Sherlock had been persistent. She rolled her eyes, she hadn't known what a beast she was creating by giving him a taste of sex. Not that she normally minded, but at the moment she was feeling anything but sexy and wished he would just leave her be.

"But I need you for a case." Sherlock took a couple of steps into the room, feeling for some reason as though he were trying to pet a tiger. It was ridiculous, he thought, but it didn't stop him from keeping his distance.

"Well, I'm sorry but you will just have to do without me." Realizing that her current position was doing absolutely nothing for her, she flopped down on the bed until her face was pressed tightly into the bedding and her hips were raised in the air. She knew she looked completely silly, but she didn't give a damn at the moment.

"I don't want to do it without….what, pray tell, are you doing?" Blinking at the absurdity of Molly's actions, Sherlock forgot to be cautious and came right up to the edge of the bed. Something that he would come to regret later.

"Auditioning for the circus….what the bloody hell does it look like I'm doing?" Flopping onto her side, she curled in full fetal position. She wanted to cry, wanted to scream, but most of all she just wanted the God damned pain to go away. Mother Nature was a sadistic bitch and no one would convince her otherwise.

"How the hell am I supposed to know? I'm not the one playing trampoline on my bed." Exasperated, that was the only word he could use to describe how he was currently feeling. Why she couldn't just give him a straight answer he would never know.

"I'm cramping you unmitigated prick! Have some sympathy!" Molly groaned again, she really shouldn't have yelled, all it had done was cause the churning in her stomach to increase.

"Are you telling me all of this is because you are on your period?" Sherlock snorted, if she thought he was going to buy into that shite she had another thing coming.

"Why else would I be twisting myself into pretzels? I don't enjoy it you know." Molly placed her hands behind her knees, clasping them together and using them to press her knees up into her belly.

"Stop this at once, it is no good to stay here and pity yourself all day. Up now, the pain can't be that bad." The moment he started talking he should have stopped, he really should have. Of course sometimes he just missed something, and this was one of those times.

"Not…not that bad?! You are fucking kidding me right?" With as much force as she could she kicked out her left leg straight into Sherlock's thigh.

"Come now Molly, surely you can deal with it. You've been to work before while menstruating and you've always seemed to handle it perfectly fine." The look on Molly's face should have clued him in, or the fact that she was now kneeling in front of him on the bed. Sadly this was one of those lessons when dealing with a girlfriend that he had yet to learn.

"I hadn't been cramping on those days, and you know why? Because I can't deal with the pain, why don't I knee you in the bollocks and see how you deal with it!" Molly placed her hands on Sherlock's shoulders, keeping him in place as he tried to move backwards and away from her.

"Now, now Molly, violence never solves anything!" It was at this point that he began to regret standing as close as he was…regret it very, very much.

* * *

John sat across from his friend, watching as the detective carefully pressed the ice pack on his lap. He probably shouldn't be laughing, but really he didn't know anyone that wouldn't be rolling around on the floor at that moment.

"I can't understand why she got so worked up." Sherlock winced as he settled further into John's sofa.

"You can't? Sherlock, you are lucky she didn't castrate you!" John rolled his eyes, many men before his friend had made the same mistake, though only Sherlock would be dumb enough to actually drive his girlfriend to knee him.

"I'm guessing that it was a bit not good?" Sherlock adjusted the ice pack, cringing at the wetness it left behind.

"Oh far beyond not good. Just, take this as a lesson for the future." John started laughing again, unable to help it as he thought about all his friend was in store for in his relationship with Molly. "Because believe me, you think this is bad. Wait until she is pregnant, you might actually need to hide the knives."

Sherlock seemed to shrink into the sofa. Oh yes, he hadn't really thought out this relationship stuff at all.

* * *

A.N: Um….Don't tell me you have never thought about doing that! I would never, but seriously every time I get told or I hear a guy say that it can't be that bad this is all I can picture in my head. And I just thought that Sherlock, not really understanding personal relationships very well would make this mistake at least once with Molly. Then he would go to John for sympathy and John would just laugh while Mary sat Sherlock down to explain to him what he did and why it was wrong and how to avoid such things in the future.


End file.
